


Stop Climbing On Things, You Fuckwit

by dw_fwedewick_heweiden



Series: Heidraki stuff [2]
Category: SCP Foundation
Genre: Heiden Continuously Climbs On Things And Relies On His Boyfriend To Get Him Back Down, Lord help this man, heiden stop climbing on things, im serious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-30 17:04:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17832629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dw_fwedewick_heweiden/pseuds/dw_fwedewick_heweiden
Summary: Heiden continuously climbs things he can't get off of and Kondraki gets mildly annoyed.





	Stop Climbing On Things, You Fuckwit

Often, Kondraki finds Heiden in the oddest places.  _ (Especially when Bright’s in a bad mood.)  _ On top of the break room fridge, inside a filing cabinet ( _ how did he even fit in there? _ ), and, on one particularly memorable occasion, sitting on one of the lamps near the top of the very high office ceiling. 

This one might just take the cake, though. “What are you doing on the roof? It’s freezing out.”

“I don’t know.” Heiden sounds genuinely puzzled. “But I th-think I’m stuck.”

“Well, do you think you can jump down?”

“I’m 70 feet up, Konnie!” Heiden shouts, sounding mildly annoyed. “I could try to slide down?”

“Even worse of an idea. How did you even manage this?!”

“I don’t know…”

Kondraki sighs. “Alright, I’m coming up,” he says, resigned. “You better not do this again.”

  
  


It’s not even a week later that Kondraki finds Heiden literally inside the fridge. “What the fuck, Heiden?”

Heiden doesn’t respond for a second, most likely because he’s mildly embarrassed and also very stuck. “Help.”

“How did you do this?”

“I wanted to see if the light stays on when you shut the fridge.”

Kondraki facepalms. “Oh my fucking god.”

“Hey, at least I know now that the fridge light goes off…?” Heiden offers quietly.

  
  


The next unusual and mildly dangerous place Kondraki finds Heiden is on top of 106’s containment chamber. “Wh- Heiden?! What are you doing up there?”

“Uh…” Heiden considers the question. “I...don’t actually know. I’m just here now.”

Kondraki stares at him for a second before deciding pressing the issue isn’t worth it. “Alright, well, do you know how to get down without falling into the pit of death?”

“Nope!” Heiden says this quite cheerfully, standing up. “I could probably jump it…”

“Absolutely not.”

  
  


“Hey, Konnie?” Kondraki looks up at his name and immediately sighs. “How-?!”

Heiden grins at him sheepishly and waves from on top of the rafters. “Can I get a little help here? I’m a little stuck again.”

Kondraki frowns a little, raising an eyebrow at him. “I’m starting to think you’re doing this on purpose,” he says. “This is happening way too often.”

“I’m not,” Heiden replies. “I’ve just been picking really, really bad spots to hide in.”

“You got that right. Hang on while I get a ladder.”

  
  


Kondraki expected to see Heiden somewhere he shouldn’t be. After all, it was starting to be a trend.

He didn’t expect Heiden to be perched on top of a storage box four times his height, inside the basement, which had been locked until he unlocked it. “Heiden, for god’s sake-”

“In my defense, Edison locked me down here,” Heiden says, rubbing the back of his head. “And I got kinda spooked, so I climbed up here.”

“I will be having...words...with Edison later,” Kondraki growls. “Until then, can you get down?”

“Oh yeah, easily.” These words were punctuated by Heiden jumping down and landing awkwardly on his hands and knees, mildly winded but otherwise unharmed. “Ow.”

Kondraki sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You’re hopeless.”

“I know,” Heiden says with a grin.

**Author's Note:**

> :))  
> Yes.
> 
> I love this ship, okay? Okay.
> 
> Heiden stop it challenge


End file.
